Simple Questions That Is Hard To Answer

Can you imagine … if somebody asked you these questions at wala ka man lang maisasagot? And can you imagine … na kung yong ina-akala mong madaling katanongan …. ay yon pa ang mahirap sagotin? 

And have you find yourself in a situation where you were asked to enumerate something … tapos nananatiling blanko ang papel …  dahil wala ka man lang maisip na isulat?

Something is really wrong with you … kung nag-aalangan ka at urong-sulong kang magsagot sa mga tanong na ito. Mga tanong na may kirot … sinasagot mo nga pero hulinghuli ka at nagsisinungaling ka lang.

Of course you can always pretend you have an answer … to save face … but deep in your heart you know there wasn’t available answer. You can always dole out answer for the sake of answering …pero alam mo sa sarili na ginawa mo lang yon dahil ayaw mong magpabuko. Here are some of them.

1. List 5 of your best friends - If you meet a lot of people… yet you don’t have a friend you can call your own … is bordering on being an aberration. Maybe you are one of those people who always think they don’t fit in your …oh so rigid yardstick. Or are you one of those meticulous freaks who are finicky with selecting friends and you allowed potential would be friends to slip through your fingers just because of some little petty details? Or maybe you are one of those nincompoop who has a rigid and a stringent requirements and criteria of friendship … where one fail miserably in your extremely severe and self-indulgent standard?

2. What have you achieved? If you don’t have answer to the question is quite an abnormality… but it happens to some people. A person who is always unsuccessful in anything they do … is a LOSER.  He is born with it (a la Maybelline) and everything he touches becomes a disaster.

3. What are your dreams and goals in life? If somebody answers none … his life is boring.  Can you imagine somebody living, breathing and he doesn’t have purpose in life?

What It Means

Kung ikaw ay mahirap tapos iniisip mo mayaman kayo … that is more like fantasy than facing reality. 

Kung ikaw ay walang trabaho tapos iniisip mo palaging may taong sasalo sa iyo … it is more of lunacy than plain immaturity. Pagsampal-sampalin mo nga ang mukha mo … para matauhan ka. Now na.

Unlucky Ba Ang Friday The 13th?

Usapan ng 2 magkaibigan:

Friend 1: Today it's Friday the 13th. Ano ba ang mga usual na paghahanda mo para makaiwas ka sa disgrasya o malas?

Friend 2: Hindi na uso sa akin and Friday the 13th.  Ano ba ang paghahandaan ko ... eh matagal na akong malas. Pinanganak akong sinalo ko lahat ng bad luck sa mundo. Sanay na ako. At ang dami ng masamang pangyayari sa buhay ko. What is there to fear about?

Friend 1: Wala ka man lang ginagawang paraan para iwasan ang kamalasan?

Friend 2: Just be myself ... kung hindi pa rin nagsawa ang buhay sa pagbigay ng PARUSA at DUSA ... nandito ako ... willing at happy na tanggapin ito.

Friend 1: Huh?

Friend 2: Sa totoo lang ... INAABANGAN ko ang mga yan! Hindi ako sanay sa GRASYA ... sanay ako sa DISGRASYA.

Naririnig Ninyo Ba Ang Mga Sarili Ninyo?

Reactions of my friends to this post.  If this is a final exam ... an imaginative teacher will suspect my friends were cheating and copying from each other. 

For one ... the answers were almost identical ... they were exactly alike and the answers had some close resemblance as to be essentially the same. 

Their answers were short ... but you could feel some sense of regret, repentance, and disappointment that this was ... in actuality happening. Here are their open-ended comments

1. Reality Bites ...

2. Reality Sucks ...

3. A Harsh Reality ...

4. Reality Check Please ... 

5. A Taste of Reality ...

I don't blame them ... at all ... if they feel shame or guilt ... and remorseful. So pinag-tagpi-tagpi ko ang mga sagot nila to come up the seering opening salvo for this post.

The last time we had REALITY CHECKED ... was when we found out the HARSH REALITY ... that REALITY BITES and that REALITY SUCKS. When we were given a TASTE OF REALITY ... it was too late to find out that when REALITY HIT US HARD ... a man-made catastrophe again showed its ugly face ... resulting in the loss of so many lives.

We know the evils of deforestation firsthand (and sorry to say this includes illegal logging). It is a known fact that as we move on from our glorious past into the modern present, forests have been balded to make room for modernization and to obtain wood for housing, manufacturing, and fuel. Deforestation completely changed the topography the terrain ... and the landscape of the discussion and debate about its pros and cons have been muffled.

But there are glaring facts that could not just be swept under the rug ... what with the constant barrage of news of floods and landslides on TV. The ill effects of deforestation were placed on the front burner - global warming, disruption of water cycles, biodiversity loss, wildlife extinction, habitat destruction, soil erosion, acidic oceans, greenhouse effect ... and the most important is the thousands of lives lost in floods. fires, avalanches, and mudslides acting as collateral damages because of man's stubbornness ... and their unwillingness to acknowledge their sins of omission and commission.

Tapos maririnig na lang natin na nangangarap ang tao to plant trees in Mars ... the same activity that we frown at hindi natin ginagawa sa Earth?

How ironical! And hypocritical!

When Expectations and Reality Are Like Tubig At Langis

Why are expectations and reality often at odds with each other? Why don't they always meet ... they don't align most of the time.

Expectations are what we picture things will happen or evolve ... while reality is what actually is the picture on hand. While we look forward to these two will pair off, they often are irreconcilably incompatible. 

When we EXPECT others can act and behave like we do ... we in REALITY don't accept them for what are. When parents think their children can continue the same honors and achievements they once had... the reality is they are being too hard on them.

This disparity of expectations vis-a-vis reality can often bring feelings of resentment and dissatisfaction. When reality does not measure up to our expectations ... it becomes a big let-down.

Just like the image above ... when you expect your dream of going to Australia and seeing Sydney's Opera House  ... will come sooner ... if not later ... but when all the plans are falling like the proverbial house of cards ... seeing your plates lining up similarly like the art theater in a drain rack in your kitchen sink... it reminds you of broken hopes and dreams.

Expectant ka that someday isa kang mabuting anak ... pero ikaw rin ang gumagawa ng problemang naghahati ng pamilya mo. Gusto mo maging good provider ka ... pero puno ka ng bisyo sa katawan ... at maliwanag pa sa sikat ng araw na walang kang trabaho ... at wala kang ginagawa para magkaroon.

So we need to watch out ... we have to think of strategies or defenses we can make use to manage HIGH expectations.

Face Reality

Are PALAKASAN SYSTEM and PADRINO MENTALITY alike? Well almost.

The Padrino system, or patronage in Filipino culture and politics, is the value system where one gains favor, promotion, or political appointment through family affiliation (nepotism) or friendship (cronyism), as opposed to one's merit.

Palakasan system is a Tagalog word that means the assertion of personal interest via lakas while subtly bypassing prescribed rules and procedures in line with "delicadeza." “Lakas means power or strength and "delicadeza" means a refusal to be vulgar or crass in exercising power.

Money is power. In the Philippines, if you don't want to queue and get wilted in a long line, money can help you find the easiest route ... and the right connections.

Face Reality

Sumakit ang ulo ng kaibigan ko sa pagKWENTA kung magkano ang sasahurin niya sa katapusan.

Ayan tuloy ... napuyat siya at hindi nakatulog sa pag-KWENTA. Binabangungot lang pala.

Isang walang-KWENTANG KUWENTO ng isang taong walang trabaho.

Rain Rain ... Go Away

I hate it ... It's raining again. Maghapong nakakulong sa bahay ... pero ang ulan non-stop. Ayan ... ano pa ba ang inaasahan natin ... mukhang babaha na naman.

Hindi ka na nga makalabas dahil takot ako sa leptospirosis pero ang utak ko ang daming hinahanap: mainit na batchoy, or kahit mami na lang, French fries, Yum Burger at Chowking Chicken Lauriat.

Putsa naman oo. Dahil bumabaha ... O sigi matulog na lang.

Yakapin Mo Ang Iyong Pagkamali

"Matuto kang YAKAPIN ang iyong PAGKAMALI. And then he started EMBRACING his computer."

I already told myself "Enough of this malapropism inanities ..." So I vowed I was not going to touch this subject with a ten-foot pole but the image's effect on me ... just send me to some deep thoughts ... the statement above and the image just make sense.

Pagkamali ba ang computer? Hindi naman ... so why the statement? Pag sinabi bang "yakapin ang iyong pagkamali ... does it mean that you have take it literally as in yakapin mo? Sa katunayan if you are you going to scrutinize the image ... you will see na parang nadagdagan pa yata ang kanyang love at "kahibangan"at pagkaaddict sa computer at paglaro ng ML games. Di ba?

Hindi ... there's another story behind the story in the image. Matalinhaga nga pero totoo. Story ito ng isang grown up adult ... at narealize na niya ang kanyang pagkamali. Istorya ito nang pagbangon at paghaharap sa buhay ... at bagong pag-asa pagkatapos ng ilang taong pagkalugmok.

Kuwento ito ng isang 27 years old na napabayaan na niya ang kanyang mga mahal sa buhay. Ang kanyang BUHAY na walang saysay at walang BUHAY ... dahil kung ang iba ay nalulong sa druga ... siya naman ay nalulong sa mobile legends. Akala niya dati hindi naman ito druga ... ang mga laro sa computer are nothing but harmless and safe past times. Yon ang akala niya

Yes, it is true ... wholesome at tame ang larong ito ... but anything that exceeds the boundaries of being normal is abnormal.

If you are past 18 and mobile legends prevent you from finding a decent job ... that is abnormal. If you spend the wee hours of the morning pounding your computer ... unmindful whether others are sleeping or not .... something is irregular. Much more if you don't care about electric bills ... kasi hindi naman ikaw ang nagbabayad?

If you care about your fellow ML player (na hindi mo naman kilala ... na nanggagaling sa kung saang lupalop ng mundo ...) more than your family something is wrong somewhere. If you worry about them at ayaw mong mabitin sila dahil gusto pa nilang maglaro ... tapos magagalit ka sa kung sino ang kumakatok sa pinto dahil disturbo lang? Malay mo emergency yon ... tapos sisihin mo ang maid dahil binuksan niya? Hindi ba abnormal yon?

And it becomes a serious problem when these harmless hobbies affect his relationship, even his health lalo na kung lagi siyang puyat at wala ng pahinga. Hindi na siya makapagluto, palaging nagmamadali. Irritable pa siya sa mga konting ingay pag siya ay natutulog dahil naghahabol siya ng konting pahinga para pagbalik ng mga kaibigan niya ready ulit siya sa magdamagang sigawan at pukpokan ng keyboard. Dahil naubos ang oras sa laro ... minsan wala nang panahon kumain at nagtitiis na lang sa Lucky Me.

Remember ang addiction ay hindi lang sa druga ... there is such a thing as NON-SUBSTANCE ADDICTION - like gambling, sex, pornography, food, the internet, shopping, gaming, casino hopping paghanga sa artista ... the list goes on and on.

One thing that describes all addiction is total LOSS OF CONTROL - loss of control sa sarili at lahat ng iyong ginagawa. The urge is irresistible ... the more you fight it ... you find yourself losing in the end.

He has lost control of his discipline and relationships ... wala na siyang panahon sa kanyang pamilya. He has lost control of his inner self ... may sarili na siyang mundong ginagalawan. He lost control of his temper ... mainitin palagi ang kanyang ulo. He has lost control of his common sense ... hindi na niya alam ang importante at hindi. Palagi na lang siya ang tama at hindi niya mawari bakit hindi siya maintiendihan ng iba ... eh gusto lang niyang mag-enjoy and have a happy life. And worst palagi siyang may hinahanap - there's an unquenchable thirst inside him na uhaw at hindi napapawi ng kahit ano pa man. Isang void na kailangang punuan.

Sa kanyang pagka-untog ... muli siyang babangon at babalik ... kasi NIYAKAP niya ang kanyang pagkamali. I-welcome natin siya at YAKAPIN natin siya ulit. And this time ... I hope he has learned his lessons.

Ganito Ba Ang Lifestyle Mo?

Sana matutunan mong matulog ng MAAGA ... hindi yong UMAGA  na.

Sana matutunan mong magtulog ng MAAGA ... hindi yong TANGHALI na... naghihikab ka pa .

Sana matutunan mong magtulog ng MAAGA ... hindi yong  HAPON na inaantok ka at papungas-pungas pa at gusto pang bumalik sa pagtulog.

Pagdating ng GABI ... dating gawi. Balik computer ulit at ML games. Parang graveyard shift na ang buhay mo. Hayaan na ang responsibilidad sa pamilya. Ang importante maligaya ka.

Namumula ang hasang at ready ka na ... at may lakas ulit sa isang magdamagang puyatan sa facebook at mobile legends.

Unmasking The Real You

Kahit nagbulagbulagan ako ... pero may pakiramdam ako.

I feel it when

-saling pusa lang pala ako at dinagdag lang.

-ginagamit lang ako

-hindi ako kasali sa original na plano

-pinagdudahan ang kakayahan ko

-iba ang trato ng tao sa akin

-pinagbigyan lang ako

-kung totoo ang tao ... at may ulterior motive

-nakipagsabwatan sila against me

-akala nila hindi ko maamoy na nagsisinungaling sila

-banko ang tingin at pananaw ng lahat sa akin ... tagapagsalba ng mga financial worries nila.

Yes ... nakikita ko ang lahat. Kung hindi man ako nagsasalita hindi ibig sabihin napakatanga ko ... lacking experience and sophistication ... and too naive and trustful.

Pinagbigyan ko lang kayo ... to unmask you ... para makita ang tunay na kulay mo.

Did You See Growth In You?

Based on the graphic chart above, would you describe yourself as stagnant? This means you did not rise or dip in your progress from 2 or 3 years ago - meaning you have stayed the same. You were not flowing in the current or stream. Your performance assumed the FLAT LINE... inactive ... motionless ... still ... lifeless ... or were you dead?

To see a visible sign of life in your personal and professional life at least a PQRST wave in your ECG tracings can be felt and clearly discernable.

Or you did not grow at all. The opposite in the process of growing is decreasing ... failing ... or waning. Was that because the scenario shows you lack personal progress and development ... or was there something prohibiting your growth and expansion?

Time flies. Before you see yourself running late or behind schedule ... examine yourself and make the necessary changes in your outlook ... and mindset.

As the image above shows ... it is indeed scary to see yourself in the same position ... where there is not even a glimmer of hope ... or a glint of pulsation can be seen.

Life Is Not a Straight Line

Life is not a straight line. If you expect that it is ...  you are inexperienced, misguided ... and you are uninformed.

Life is not a straight line where you come up with a lot of blessings, and experience miracles in the next episodes ... that lead you to heaven to enjoy an everlasting life.

"Life is a long and winding road," says the Beatles in the sixtees.

Life is a snake pit ... a quagmire ... a Gordian knot ... and a hard nut to crack. It is a convoluted trek ... unforeseen and not formulaic. With all its intricacies and complexities ... like a Pinoy teleserye, it has its unpredictable curves and frequent changes in direction. The plot is loaded with erratic twists and turns ... and just like any person's mood it has its highs and lows vacillating like a clock's pendulum.

The "straight line" notion of life is too naive and very simplistic.  It suggests an effortless journey replete with "all joys and no sorrows" ... all good and no bad scenarios... and that is just a lot of bull.

And to quote Richard Rohr: "Life is not or never has been a straight line forward.   Life is characterized much more by exception and disorder ... than by total or perfect order."

The seismic tracing in the Richter scale of our lives helps us understand to be wary of what is in store for us. These seismic convulsive seizures keep us GOING and make us have that awareness that we are ALIVE ... and make us prepare for the next jolt.

For isn't a flat line (straight line) in ECG ... mean life has ENDED?

Your Plan VS Reality

 YOUR PLAN shows the easiest route to reach your goal. But life is no fairy tale ... and is not that easy ... the way you see it.

REALITY shows you the sad fact of life. To be successful .. you have to sweat it out. Nobody has promised you a rose garden.

TRANSLATION: Nobody has ever told you that things were going to be easy and wonderful all the time. Expect the bumps in the road.

Reality Bites

Question: Bakit ang mga UTANG MEMES ni Chinkee Tan ay nanunuot hanggang bulalo. Yon bang kahit hindi ka nangungutang ... pati ikaw tinatamaan BULLSEYE and of all places sa ulo pa?

Kahit matindi ang mga banat ni Chinkee ... and he doesn't mince a word he says ... he call a spade a spade. The reason why his memes kept haunting you in your sleep ay dahil puro katotohanan lang naman ... and nothing but the truth ang mga sinasabi niya.

Was it because REALITY BITES ... (real things or the real nature of things rather than imagined, invented or theoretical ideas).

Was it because REALITY SUCKS? That the harsh truths are difficult to accept and deal with?

Was it because the TRUTH HURTS? And Chinkee managed to shatter the illusions you built in your mind? 

Was it because it is a PAINFUL HONESTY and it hurts ... because it makes us confront something we have been in denial?

Or was it because the state of things Chinkee said appears to be the GOSPEL TRUTH and there are no attempts to explain or justify the behavior or attitude with logical reasons? Even if it is not appropriate, can it change the sad fact?

SAD Reality

 

Dream ,,, And Make Them HAPPEN

Every great dream begins with the dreamer.  We have the freedom and the liberty to dream big ... no matter how silly or impossible they are.

What is important is what to do with those dreams and aspirations. Do we dream big for the sake of just dreaming? Do we fantasize about an abundant life - a big house, fancy cars, a lavish lifestyle - because it is the most convenient and the cheapest at the moment - only to have some rude awakening the reverie was only temporary?

Everybody has dreams. And it is what we do with those dreams that matter. Everybody has aspirations ... what's wrong with pushing more to make it happen. DREAMS once you make the decision to act on them become a REALITY.

Reality Bites

There is a growing resentment amongst millennials and OFWs questioning the validity of this tired old and toxic Filipino culture: Is it the child's responsibility to send money to their parents as payment for being brought up?

I believe their resentment is justified. I know where they are coming from ... especially if they have a family to feed now.

Turning the tables upside down, I just hope the same kind of resentment will rise if you have a brother or sister or a friend who is able and strong, but still lives with Mama or Papa and still depends on them for their daily and personal needs. This needs to stop too.

Fair enough?

Bangon ... Gising

Not so long ago ... wala kang iniisip kundi sarili mo. Kung gusto mong magising ng tanghali ... magagawa mo. Kung tinatamad ka ... puede kang nakahilata buong maghapon na walang magrereklamo.  If you want a little more time for yourself ... puede kang matulog nang wagas hanggang sumakit na ang ulo mo. Noon yon.

Iba na ang kalakaran ngayong pamilyado ka na. Nagising ka sa katotohanang kailangan kang magbangon kahit ina-antok ka pa. Papungas pungas ka pa ... pero kailangan hilahin mo ang katawan mo ... dahil may mga taong umaasa sa iyo - ang mga anak mo at asawa mo.

Noon wala kang bills na iniisip ... dahil inako lahat ng parents mo ang responsibilidad. Iba na ngayon ... dahil you are practically on your own. Iisipin mo ang babayarin sa kuryente, sa tubig, sa pagkain, sa renta ng bahay, sa diaper at gatas ng mga anak mo. Kailangan mo magbanat ng buto ... para patunayan mo na isa kang good provider.

These realizations are prerequisites para ihanda mo ang sarili mo sa mga dambuhalang mga responsibilidad in the future. Ito ang totoo at tunay na laro ng buhay ... kung hindi pa maliwanag sa iyo ... aba eh dapat mahimasmasan ka na. 

Dahil ano man ang iwas mo ... hindi mo magawang bale walain lang. Hindi na pwede na ituloy mo pa yong dating walang pakialam mong mga pananaw at saloobin ... hindi puedeng ipikit mo ang mga mata mo at dedma ka na lang sa mga responsibilidad mo. 

Hindi puedeng magkibit balikat ka at tulakbahala ka na lang ... dahil mumultohin ka ng mga sikmurang gutom ... mg mga kuryenteng pinuputol ... ng mga labahing gabundok ... ng pakipagpatintero mo sa mga naniningil ... ng refrigirator na puro tubig ang laman.

Welcome sa masalimuot na laro ng buhay.  At huwag kang hihirit pa at magtanong ... bakit ako? 

Hindi lang naman ikaw iho ... lahat tayo. 

Caption That (Prusiyon Ng Itim na Nazareno)

Diska-diskarte lang yan. Minsan mabilis kang makarating sa iyong paroroonan kung marami kang tinapakang tao. Wala silang pakialam sa reputasyon ... ang importante mairaos ang problema

Ang iba nanloloko ... nagsisinungaling ... nanggagamit ... nang-scam ...  nangungutang ... namba-blackmail, and others resort to crimes just to get what they want. And then they are caught ... tapos isisisi sa kahirapapan ang lahat ... and worst put the blame on some innocent people.

A sad commentary on what values the young generation has learned and believed. Hindi naman lahat ... pero marami sila.