New Years Resolutions

Why do we have to make a new New Year's resolution after we fail to complete the old ones? Good question.

As promised yesterday, we need to inject humor into the business of PLEDGING to make a PROMISE, so we will not get stressed out if we fail to complete what we VOWED to do.

Below, I made some resolutions not only for myself, but also for people close to me. 

We are doing this for the laughs ... sakali mang may mapikon ... Bato-bato sa langit ang mapikon ... sigi ituloy mo na kung gusto mong magalit.

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My New Year's Resolution is to become a budgetarian and a vegetarian.

Tightening one's belt ... a "budgetarian" has to be a vegetarian ... even if okra is slimy and ampalaya is bitter. Vegetables are cheaper compared to buying beef and pork ... sakali mang hindi mo pa alam yan.

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Mom wants to lose weight. It is an oath she wants to keep.

Just don't show her KFC Hotshots, Pork Chop, or Bicol Express. And when you go to the mall ... avoid passing by Chow King.

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Iiwasan ko rin ang mga bagay na nagpapataba sa akin.

And that includes weighing scales ... and lifesize mirrors. Iwasan ko na rin tingnan ang aking old FB photos that will remind me of what I once was..

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Michael's New Year's Resolution: "I will improve my art in procrastination ." That's manana habit, dummy.

"And to prove that ... I will start tomorrow."

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Shiela promised she will pet more dogs.

Michael agrees as long as she will pet him, too. And she cleaned the dog's shit ... pronto.

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Alfred's pledge this year: "I have never been serious, but I will be more patient and tolerant this time."

If something goes wrong ... don't blame me.  I will blame you!

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David's sacred vow? To improve his memory and his retention.

So if you tell him, "Go see Michael if he is around." His answer should never be: "Who's Michael?"

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Bonjo loves to eat, it is hard for him to say no.

His idea of a New Year's resolution is how he can fix five small, frequent meals in a day ... midnight snack excluded.

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Katong has just achieved his six pack (I termed it a chiseled stomach or washboard ripped abs)... so he wants to maintain it.

He wondered what his resolution would be like with Bonjo around, showing him the rudiments of how to have a voracious appetite.

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Every year ... Shiela makes it a point to change herself.

This year ... for a change ... she just wants to be herself.

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Mark and Jane are a photophile. They just love taking photos with their family in a restaurant, out-of-town picnic, on nature tripping, and camping.

There's nothing to change for them. Family is family.

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I was planning to tell Mike his New Year's resolution should include giving more hugs to the kids.

I could almost see Scott react: "But not in public ... Daddio!"

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Zyle wants her dream girl to be the happiest that she could be. She loves her very much.

For the record, that dream girl, by the way, is her.

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After being hospitalized ... Scott wants to avoid peppery, spicy, and tangy food. Well, he had 1 bout of projectile vomiting again.

Can you blame me?"he said. All that hot, spiced, and seasoned food meant one thing.  They taste good.

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PJ's promise: "New year ... new me."

After 15 minutes, he comes back  saying, "Never mind ... forget it."

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My other resolution is to go out and SIN no more.

My inner self thinks otherwise.  He wants me to go out and be SEEN more.

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