Are You Being Used? 1

Did you ever feel you were being used by a friend or a family member?  I know it hurts and you can't just fathom somebody close to you is manipulating you and taking advantage of you.

The feeling is revolting and there are times you ask yourself how you allowed yourself to be misled or exploited. You feel you were in limbo and you are beginning to lose trust in anybody around you. You feel you were hit or attacked by an opponent on the blind side. You were taken by surprise uninformed and unprepared.

There are some telltale signs of whether a friend or family member is just using you. Review these hallmark signs and cues to whether it is time to pull the plug and get rid of these erring nincompoops in your immediate vicinity.

Ask yourself this:  Did you realize this friend or family member reaches out only when he or she wants to ask a favor? Does your friend or family member texted or called you to know how your day was ... or made you feel you existed? Had they been on social media communicating with you? 

Had they ever said " Let's catch up about things that we missed? Did they ever visit you ... to check on you? Had they been thinking about you ... and had you been always in their minds and hearts?

Take note of their silence ... and their unavailability ... If during Christmas and New Year you see them partying with other friends ... and you languish in the narrow confines of your room ... this is a wake-up call.  And if this becomes a continued template and design ... then it is possible you are being used.

Are You Being Used Part 2

Do you have genuine friends or family members? After a bad day, are they someone you'd ring for a chat to make you feel better, or would the conversation end up being about them?​  

Are they expecting you to listen to them but are not willing to hear what you have to say?

It doesn't take a rocket scientist to smell if you are being used or not. There are still a lot of red flags and alarm signs that you need to consider. Huwag magbulag-bulagan at magbait-baitan ... hindi ka naman siguro tanga para hindi mo ito mapansin.

In a relationship, being used might involve selfishness and disinterest in your needs. It may also involve someone only being interested in a financial relationship while refusing to make any other type of emotional commitment.

To cut to the chase ... you are being used if you see these:

1. The conversation is always about I, me. mine, we, us, ours.  It is never about you.

2. They exclude you from social events... they go out with other friends without you.

3. You are constantly being told NO. And they want you to say YES and agree with them all the time.

4. The favorite topic is always about them. Conversations are a one-way street.

1. 5. They always let you pick up the check. ... You are always paying for everything.
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3. 6. You always have to come to their rescue. They get angry when you are not available.  You always have to be at their beck and call.
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5. 7. They never say thank you. Because there is always the next time.  It is a never-ending seeking for solutions to small and big problems and issues.

8. They never take you out ... you took them out as if you promise them I am here for you till kingdom come.

9. They put NO  effort into saving your relationship. They expect you to be there to always understand them.

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2. 10. They're always asking for favors. As if they were born needy ... wanting help all the time. They reach out to you because they are bored and they expect you to entertain them.

11. They pressure you into almost everything.  They create the problem and you supply the solution.

12. They are lying to you. Remember they can do no wrong ... because they are always in the wrong side of the issue.

13. They are always the victim ... the innocent party and you became the fall guy.

14. They invite you only as an afterthought.  Or at the last minute. Maybe for the leftovers.

15. They never take advice.  They prefer to complain about how unfair life is. They never take responsibility.

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2. 16. They make you feel guilty about the problems they created. They made the problem ... and they blame you for it.
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17. You feel drained trying to solve their problems. Everything that happens in their life is a pulsating suspense thriller.

18. You are a mere spectator in their life ... while they are hugging the spotlight. You check on their life on the sidelines and are ready to go centerstage when the occasion calls for it.

19. They always say they will return the favor ... or they will change for the better ... but they never had.  The next time they call you ... you are still dealing with the same problem.

20.  And lastly they are not grateful. They are not genuinely appreciative of what you have done for them.