The Psychodynamics of PA-Victim Syndrome

There are too many reasons bakit gusto ng tao magtago at magkunyaring victim sila. Why do people pretend to be what they are not?

It all boils down to 1) insecurity feelings and 2) the fear of rejection.

Some people feel insecure about their TRUE selves and the stinging fear of non-acceptance, exclusion, and avoidance is just too much to bear. They were afraid of being brushed off, dismissed, ignored, and black-listed ... so they created a FACADE to hide their vulnerabilities.

Pretending to be someone you're not ... is the most available ploy to dodge personal inadequacies into more something acceptable to your conscious self ... compared to letting everybody see who you truly are. 

It's an effort to deal with and defeat a misguided notion (one that is made without good judgment and careful thought)  that the real you is somehow not worthy. And that what they think of you has a semblance of truth.

Someone may pretend to be a different person (in this case pretending to be the victim) mainly because they are not contented or happy being the person that they are right now. This usually happens to people who have traumatic experiences that cause embarrassment and humiliation ... self-denigration or self-hate ... and guilt.

To understand more about the "pa-victim syndrome" or victim mentality... identifying the defense mechanism used by the afflicted person would be a great help. Depending on the circumstances ... the person can use one or a combination of several other defense mechanisms.

1. Imitation - This is a defense mechanism where a person copies someone else behavior.  Because of feelings of insecurity ... he is using the coping mechanism of imitation or mimicry. When the person feels becoming a pa-victim will draw more attention and pity to himself ... and gather all the people to his side ... he unconsciously mirrors the situation of being a pa-victim as something very successful. Kaya niya ginagamit ito kasi ngayon lang niya naexperience na this scheme will bring everybody to his corner and side with him..

2. Denial - It is a type of defense mechanism that involves ignoring the reality of a situation to avoid anxiety. Defense mechanisms are strategies that people use to cope with distressing feelings. In the case of denial, it can involve not acknowledging reality or denying the consequences of that reality. So the person refuses to think na siya ang nambibiktima ... he turned the situation upside down by making accounts and stories on the contrary ... that he was the victim.

People in denial may block external events or circumstances from the mind so that they don't have to deal with their emotional impact and the gravity of the situation. In other words, they avoid painful feelings or events ... the nagging truth that his pronouncements and stories are bogus and phony.

Denial is when you refuse to believe something true. Often, the more strongly you want to deny something, the more likely it is to be true.

3. Projection - It is a defense mechanism involving taking your unacceptable qualities or feelings and ascribing them to other people. For example, if you strongly dislike your parent (in Pinoy culture disliking a parent is bad, so you don't want to be that bad person). So using projection as a defense mechanism you project that feeling to your parent. The truth is you don't like your Dad ... so instead you decide and you keep telling everybody it was the other way around ...  "My Dad does not like me".

The same mechanics can be said about pa-victim people. Realizing that victimizing or bullying other people or making other's life miserable is unacceptable. They DENIED the truth ... and twisted the facts... and PROJECTED ... they are the victims instead.

This is a classic example of when a person utilizes a combination of two or more defense mechanisms to successfully lay out his plan of moving away from the danger zone.