Sa Central Bank Ni Aling Nena

Word: Candy

Definition: Parang pera ... na hindi naman. Pwedeng kasing panukli sa mga tindahan sa Pilipinas ... pero hindi pwedeng pambayad.

Essay:

In the midst of a changing global economy, one nation has discovered the secret to infinite wealth: the Philippines. While other countries fight over gold and Bitcoin, we are quietly building an empire based on Maxx, Snow Bear, and White Rabbit.

Let’s face the facts: In the Philippines, candy isn’t just sugar—it’s Legal Tender (coins or banknotes that must be accepted if offered in payment), well, semi-legal.

The "Central Bank of Aling Nena"

Only here will you experience a unique banking miracle. 

When the cashier is short one peso for your change, they don’t apologize. 

Instead, they hand over two pieces of Stork with a sweet smile that says: "Here is your retirement fund, my loyal customer."

The Sari-Sari Store Exchange Rate (As of 2026):

Philippine Peso (PHP)	Candy Equivalent
₱1.00	2 Pieces of Mentos
₱5.00	A handful of Choc-nut
₱0.25	One candy with the wrapper stuck to it

The Paradox of "Kendi-nomics"

Candy is like a "Ghost" lover: you feel its value when it’s being given to you, but that value vanishes the moment you try to offer it.

Try walking into a mall and paying for a new iPhone with three sacks of Dynamite candies. 

The guard, who was polite just moments ago, will suddenly turn into a "Wolf Warrior" as he shoos you out. 

Why? Because candy has One-Way Sovereignty.

"Candy is money that can be used as change, but never as payment. It is the only currency in the world that you have to eat just so you don't feel like you lost money."

Rules of the "Sweet" Currency:

1. The Expiry Clause: Real money doesn't spoil, but your candy-change can become as hard as cement after sitting in your pocket for a week.
2. The Dentist’s Conspiracy: It is said that cashiers and dentists have a secret agreement. The more candy given as change, the more "fillings" and "extractions" will be earned in the future. GDP growth, baby!
3. The Jeepney Gamble: Try handing three Potchi gummies to the Jeepney driver to cover your lack of fare. Let’s see if you don’t get kicked out in the middle of a flyover while being showered with the driver's "Rhetorical Gymnastics."

In Conclusion: Love Wisely, Chew Wisely

If Senator Robin Padilla of the world says the youth are "weak," perhaps it’s because they don’t know how to negotiate using sugar yet. 

The truly brave are the Filipinos who accept candy as change without complaint—but are ready to go to war if the count is missing a single piece.