Something Is Wrong Part !

Check this out.   You may have been showing signs of a personality disorder and you did not even know it. Abnormal is defined as something deviating from normal or the usual. Other terms used as synonyms are: unnatural, irregular, anomalous, aberrant, and deviant.

Abnormal behavior describes a state, condition, or behavior that is unusual or different from what is considered normal.

There are different types of personality disorders.  To an amateur or layperson, it is immaterial discussing it en toto or delve into the subject deeply. This post is just a guide when you see unusual signs in yourself or a family member and be reminded that something is quite off.  

Just like physical conditions or diseases such as stroke or diabetes, it is a must that a layman will be able to recognize alarm signs that need immediate attention, any delay can mean fatal or total disaster.

The same thing to human behavior, everybody needs to be equipped with the knowledge to identify what has deviated in you emotionally, behaviorally, and psychologically and this includes feelings, emotions, thoughts, and behavior.

Behaviorally these are the flag signs that need to be included in your daily personal bodily and mental checks.

1. Something is wrong if you have difficulty trusting others and believing somebody is plotting something bad against you. You always interpret danger in every situation and you are in constant watch of people around you.  You don't see good in people ... there is always something you can criticize. (Paranoid Personality Disorder)

2. Something is wrong if you are totally dependent on other people with your needs. Relying on somebody to make a decision for you is a Hallmark sign. You let others be responsible for you financially and in other areas. You dilly-dally most of the time with your decisions because of some irrational fear or some feeling of mistrust. The person tends to be a "yes person" too submissive for comfort and he finds himself in meetings or seminars agreeing to an opinion or ideas he hates and loathes. (Dependent Personality Disorder)

3. Something is wrong if you are trying to avoid social interaction or scenarios where you have to spend a chunk of your time with others ... such as at work or parties.  In a class reunion, he hates being asked what profession he is in and feels belittled when topics about achievements were raised. He is overly sensitive with comments and thought the class reunion was a conspiracy ... where achievers flaunt what they have and owned. (Avoidant Personality Disorder)

Something Is Wrong if -Part 2

 

4,  Something is wrong if you have a hard time forming a relationship with your partner, family member, or anybody at work. They always thought having a relationship with them is inconvenient and a nuisance.  They always think the only person that can do right is themselves and forming a relationship is just trouble waiting to happen.  They felt indifferent and lukewarm in their bond with other family members and they are not interested in meaningful personal connections ... and intimacy is an uphill climb. (Schizoid Personality Disorder)

5. Something is wrong if you are unable to contain your anger. And when you explode ... volcanic emotional debris were spewed to smithereens like fireworks on Christmas Day. They behaved irresponsibly and show no regard for societal/social etiquette or normal social behavior. They don't have guilt and show no signs of remorse or regret. They also act witty and charming ... and are good at flattery and manipulating other people's emotions.  They lie and con and break the law repeatedly. (Anti-social Personality Disorder.)

6.  Something is wrong when you are impulsive and you indulge in risky behavior.  If you sabotage your success by suddenly resigning or quitting a handsome job, borrowing money when you are jobless, suddenly terminating a very promising career or getting separated ... or you file for divorce when everything seemed fine and dandy are behaviors under this category. (Impulsive Personality Disorder).

7.  Something is wrong if you suddenly feel your popularity is waning and felt you are not the toast of the party anymore. If you feel underappreciated and when you are not the center of commotion ... you go the second mile to regain your lost glory. If you have that uncontrollable desire and impulse to attract attention and make dramatic entrances to be the life of the party once more ... when you constantly search for approval, become flirtatious, manipulative seductive, and charming ...  then you belong in this group.(Histrionic Personality Disorder)

8. Something is wrong if you have a preoccupation with power, money, beauty, or success. If you feel you are self-entitled and have a grandiose feeling of self-importance, needs constant praise and admiration, frequently demean, intimidate, or bully others, wanted only to be seen and be around the clique of the rich and the famous, the powerful and the beautiful ... welcome to the group, there is room enough for you. (Narcissistic Personality Disorder.)

9. And something is wrong when you have a preoccupation with details and rules.  When you are hoarding and not able to throw things away even when the items kept have no value, compulsive cleaning or handwashing, compulsive checking (checking windows and doors are locked, checking if the lights and appliances are on or off), counting and recounting of money, arranging and rearranging of things and kept them orderly and symmetrical, they are all strange behaviors but it is happening right within our midst. (Obsessive-compulsive Behavior Disorder)

So have you done some self-examination and checked yourself if you are guilty of these symptoms? You never know ... you are in for a big surprise! 

Responding To Netizen's Comment

Netizen: I am wondering why there are people who are not aware that they have Personality Disorders. Can't they see the obvious ... and not wonder why they are behaving so badly?

Response: The obvious reason for this lack of awareness is that the person doesn't know the thin line separating normal from abnormal.  A person may have volatile anger and is ready to explode anytime regardless of whether neighbors will hear or not. After the anger episode, he will just dismiss it as nothing ... and maybe rationalized it as he was just venting out his emotions.

Anger can be a positive and useful emotion if it is expressed appropriately. The clearest yardstick that your anger is healthy is when the morning after you feel better ... and you feel you are a new person.  And the other person (who is the object of anger) felt the same way too.

Anger becomes unhealthy when it entices someone to hurt and generates thoughts of getting even ... or worse ... violence and revenge. When somebody shows infantile temper tantrums and makes verbal arguments that end up in yelling or screaming, or threatening others ... and segue on physically assaulting people or animals with weapons are classic examples.

The second reason for this lack of awareness is that the person simply doesn't know there is a better way of thinking ... feeling or behaving. Instead of using "fire against fire" when the anger is at crescendo ... (or he uses an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth mantra) ... it is obvious he is not aware there are alternative ways to deal with the problem in a professional and mature way possible.

And third, some people lack self-awareness that they have a personality problem partly because those who have them don't see their symptoms as something they will worry about.

Someone with a lack of self-awareness is usually not willing to listen to what others have to say about their behavior at home, at work, or in relationships. They tend to view feedback as criticism, especially if they are insecure, have low self-esteem, or think they're beyond reproach.

HORI7ON - 'Lovey Dovey' MV

Women are like

                                                      Nicole Borromeo - Miss International Philippines 2023

Women are like ... hot cocoa.

Men thinks of them as warm HUGS ... in their MUGS.

 

Pray For Your Enemy

In our Religion class Sister Superior had taught us that as Catholics, the Bible encourages us to love our enemies. Sister must be nuts saying that ... but when I open the Bible once, it is all there ... and one way of showing that love (Matthew 5:44) is to pray for those who have wronged and persecute us.

We do pray every day... and we are doing it to people we don't even know (like praying for Luzon lately who witness the fury and devastation of super typhoon Mawar/Betty.)  When Russia invaded Ukraine we pause for a moment and offer our silent prayers to the civilians who were caught in the middle of the crossfire. And we did pray also to the government of Russia & Ukraine...  that the soonest time possible they can find an alternative solution to this armed conflict.

Praying for your enemy is kind of in apropos and sounds way off especially if you have a boss who wrings your patience ... or a co-worker who exploits and sucks you dry, or a daughter whose daily routine is to ask for money ... but has the nerve to say you haven't done anything to me.

Yes, they are those people and the Bible has taught us to chill ... and refrain from giving ourselves to the invitation of revenge and resentment.

Here are the Bible samplings:

Luke 6:27-28 - But to you who are listening I say" Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.

Proverbs 24:17 - Do not rejoice when your enemy falls, and let not your heart be glad when he stumbles.

-Romans 12:14, 17-19 - Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Fo not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but let room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord.

-Romans 12:14, 17-19 -Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse . . . Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.

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